Ever wish you were invisible? Sometimes I do…
Sometimes it’s difficult being a pastor’s wife in a small town. A couple of weeks ago I was in our local Wal-mart shopping for…umm…underclothes. I was standing in the “unmentionables” section trying to decide between a racerback (isn’t that a college mascot?) and a balconette (possibly the little porch on the top floor of antebellum houses?) when an older gentlemen from our church spotted me. He made a beeline to me and immediately struck up a conversation, apparently immune to the scantily clad models on the labels surrounding me. It was quite awkward, especially when I looked down and realized that in my hands was a bra labeled “Extreme Pushup for Enhanced Cleavage.” My mortified blush was obvious to everyone but this kind man who took that opportunity to carry on a perfectly normal conversation in spite of the glow on my face.
This is not an isolated experience. Life as a small town PW is filled with moments when you find yourself unexpectedly scrutinized. People want to know where I shop and what movies I’ve seen. They follow me on Facebook, read my posts & comments, and click on the links I share. They know what time I go to bed because they can see if my lights are one. They know when my kids miss school because their kids ride the same bus. They know if I don’t feel like cooking supper because they see me at the Dollar General in my pj’s buying a frozen pizza on a busy night.
When the stress of the scrutiny and the pressure to perform starts to get to me, I refocus my attention back on my Audience of ONE. I remind myself of this word from Paul:
Dear brothers and sisters, pattern your lives after mine, and learn from those who follow our example. Phil. 3:17
The lyrics from one of my newest favorite songs also remind me of this truth:
If people walk with me, talk with me, looking for truth; they’re gonna find out soon: If they’re following me, then, they’re gonna follow You.
That’s what I want: for my life to cause others to walk closer to Christ. Makes me not mind people watching me so much…though I will probably be buying my underwear online from now on! 😉
Ever had an embarrassing experience as a small town PW? Leave a comment so we can laugh together! Want to hear more from my newest favorite song? Here’s a link to the video:
PS… The video at the bottom of the page is not mine…it’s an ad…you can just ignore it and click on the link above to see the real video. 🙂